Being kind to yourself is the whole principle of self-care.
I think everyone can admit sooner or later, be it for a second or over a long period of time, we can put too much pressure on ourselves, in whatever facet of life that may be and it can spurn negative thought patterns about how we see ourselves.
Common examples like:
I should have written more today…
Why couldn’t I just get up on time today? I’m so incompetent…
I look awful in whatever I wear…
He hasn’t texted me back yet, he must hate me…
I’ll never be beautiful enough/talented enough…I’ll never get where I need to be…
Even if you have to say it out loud, STOP!
*clears throat* I’ll see myself out…
Anyway! You know when they say your thoughts create your reality? It’s true! I was taught when a life coach did a lecture in one of my classes in university: Your thoughts create actions, actions create your reality etc.
None of us are perfect. We all have to combat negative thought patterns to stop being cripplingly hard on ourselves and to stop our self-esteem going on a downward spiral.
I know what you’re thinking, “Well, that’s easier said than done!” Trust me, I know! I know at times it can feel like this:
But it can be done!
Think of it like this. If a friend, boyfriend/girlfriend, wife/husband, family member etc. was saying the awful things you say to yourself, would you stand for it? No!
You’d stand up for yourself and tell them they were wrong. Well that’s what you need to do with your negative thought patterns.
An exercise I was taught was to write down any negative things I thought about myself on a series of post-it notes, then write it’s positive counterpart on a different post-it note and stick it over the negative.
For example: let’s use a common one like: I’m not good enough. Write that on a post-it note.
You may very well feel like that, but I can assure you, that’s not true in the slightest.
Now what’s the opposite of that thought pattern? I am good enough. Now write that and place it over the negative post-it.
The more you counter these patterns with the positive opposite, even if you do that for five minutes, helps to combat those negative reinforcements and boost your self esteem.
Granted it’s not an overnight cure, it’s going to take some work on your part, but you’ll get there!
The more your self-esteem grows, you will grow to be happier in yourself and that will affect every facet of your life, such as relationships, work, family etc.
And if there are people that don’t like that you are feeling better about yourself, then they’re not worth your time.
Part of healthy relationships is loving and supporting, not tearing them down.
Keep at it, and don’t let anyone make you feel like you’re not enough, least of all yourself, because you are enough.
Hope you enjoyed this post guys! 🙂
Happy Sunday! 🙂
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